Being with an immature partner is not only embarrassing but also exhausting. This goes on to explain the saying that maturity is not by age. It’s not even by size or the features that show someone who has advanced in age. It’s more about the level of reasoning and behavioral patterns on display at every point in time. It must be noted that some of the childish attitudes of your partner could be defense mechanisms built over time as a result of unmet expectations, unexpressed emotions, and unfulfilled needs. So, understanding is key to building a meaningful relationship.
But how would you know if you are dating a boy in a man’s body? The signs are always there, looking at you in the face. The obvious signs and then the ones you can’t see but are displayed at intervals.
1. Outward Appearance
The first obvious sign is his outward appearance. If at his age, he doesn’t know how to dress up like a man, then he is still a boy. Mature men take time to look good. This is in accordance with the saying that you dress the way you want to be addressed. If he walks like a boy, dresses like a boy, then he is a boy.
2. Lack of Direction
Another sign is a lack of direction. Mature men are intentional. They are sure of what they want. They don’t allow you to second-guess the relationship. They take control and leadership of the relationship. Anytime you get that feeling to ask, “What are we? What are we doing? Or where is this relationship going to?” That is the handwriting on the wall. A mature man does not want to play games with your heart and emotions. Only boys do that.
3. Poor Communication Skills. In addition, if your love interest lacks communication skills, that is a clear sign that he is just a boy. Matured men know how to articulate their thoughts and pass it down to their listeners. That unnatural shyness or the inability to talk in the presence of people, especially the females folks shows an underlying childish nature. Mature men are always confident and bold. Matured men are also assertive if they are talking to the ladies. As a matter of fact, if your partner constantly exhibit some inadequacies and inconsistencies in the communication process, that is the clear sign that he is still a boy. That’s the peep into his brain level of development.
4. Withdrawal and Silent Treatment However, you might notice that he knows how to communicate but he is always withdrawn after an argument, that is a good sign that you still have a boy as a partner. Silent treatment, as they call it, is a childish way to iron out differences. No matter the level of annoyance in the argument, there is always room for dialogue, and dialogue has been proven to be the best form of conflict resolution. Avoiding the hard conversation that will lead to healing and mutual understanding is a clear sign of an immaturity.
5. Inability to Handle Disagreements Moreover, when they could not withstand any form of disagreement, it’s a major red flag because a saying goes that we disagree to agree. Anybody who cannot withstand an opposing view in a conversation is just a boy in a man’s body. One of the preliminary signs of a mature mind is the ability to entertain a contrary opinion without accepting it. It is only a mature man who can calm down and listen to a different argument. Some people will feel threatened or even attacked when your thoughts do not tally with theirs. This shows immaturity.
6. Emotional Instability.
In fact, some immature partners are emotionally unstable people. It’s always this emotional instability that will drive them into saying or doing what they are not supposed to do. When someone is said to be emotionally unstable, that person cannot generally control their feelings. If it happens to be a matter of excitement, that person will be hysterical about it. Imagine someone laughing out loud in a corporate office that is quiet and serious with work. No matter how funny something is, maturity demands that you read the room and control your excitement or anger. So, if you have a partner who cannot control his feelings of anger or excitement, that is a clear sign that the person is still a boy.
7. Avoiding Responsibility
Consequently, if you are dating someone who is always running away from responsibility, it is an indication that the person is immature. The ability to take up responsibility is what differentiates the men from the boys. The boys are used to people catering to them and if someone carries this mentality into their relationship, it will affect the partner because there will be gross negligence and irresponsibility that may end the relationship. Taking responsibility also covers the aspect of taking the blame when things go wrong.
8. Taking the Blame
Subsequently, some people would rather bark like a dog than take the blame for what they did that was wrong. They do this mostly out of arrogance or egotistic disposition, but under this prideful look is just a boy who is afraid of what will happen if he takes the blame. So, insecurity and immaturity work hand in hand. The immature partner is just worried about what people will say. That is why he has to come up with an explanation for everything, while exonerating himself from the mess. Mature men take the blame and move on with life, not minding what people would say behind their backs.
9. People-Pleasing
As a matter of fact, partners who try to please people all the time are showing sign of immaturity. This is caused by lack of understanding and wisdom. The truth is that you cannot please everybody. No matter what you do, people must talk. Their mouths are their personal belongings and you can’t tell them how to use them by acting to please them. The bottomline is just simple. Be yourself. Do you, and the world will adjust. Sometimes, trying to please people can be destructive. You will lose your focus, peace of mind, time, and energy trying to make other people happy while you end up in depression. It’s not worth it. It is better to be mindful of doing the right thing that makes you feel happy and allows people to say what they want to say. But if you see anyone who is trying hard to please people, even at their own risk, that person is still a boy.
In summary, when you spot an immature partner, there must always be the telltale signs that are showing but some people are blinded by love not to see them. If these signs of immaturity are not addressed as fast as possible, it will sabotage the relationship or bring it to an end.
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